


Alcohol - The Door to Opportunities

by SuperSillyAndDorky06



Series: The Door to Opportunities [2]
Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, And Oliver Queen Is Hers, Clubbing, Drinking & Talking, Drunk Dialing, Drunken Flirting, F/M, Felicity Smoak Is His Lobster, Five Times, Fluff, Gen, Teasing, Tommy Merlyn is Alive, drunk Oliver
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2016-03-13
Packaged: 2018-05-26 11:11:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6236350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperSillyAndDorky06/pseuds/SuperSillyAndDorky06
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Five Times Oliver Called Felicity on Boys Night (Or Stages of their Relationship Through Drunk Talk).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alcohol - The Door to Opportunities

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by last night’s Colin and Stephen goodness. This completely ran away from me. Tommy Merlyn is alive and well (and in my head he lives in Bali and that’s who Oliver and Felicity visit on the show). 
> 
> One shot. Sort of AU. Canon divergence at least. Hope you enjoy it! 
> 
> Do leave me your thoughts, guys!
> 
> Happy reading!!!

 

 

* * *

 

**STAGE #1 : STRANGERS**

It was her phone ringing at an ungodly hour that woke her up. Grumbling, she reached out to the bedside table and touched the phone. Half-asleep, Felicity picked up the call without opening her eyes to see who it was and placed it on top of her ear. The moment she did...

_“Hello.”_

Someone slurred, making her open her eyes to check the caller id. Unknown. 

“Um. Who’s this?” she asked, stifling a yawn, making a mental list of people she knew, men in particular, who could be drunk at this hour and calling her. The number was unsurprisingly zero. 

“This is me,” the heavy male voice rasped out, as if she was supposed to miraculously know exactly who he was, before he burst into chuckles as if he’d cracked the joke of the century. Felicity sat up in her bed, frowning. 

“Who are you?” she asked again, sleep fading from her mind. 

“Who do you want me to be?” the male voice asked flirtatiously, before someone else guffawed loudly from behind him. 

Rolling her eyes, Felicity cut the call and snuggled back into bed. 

It rang again. Same number. She gingerly picked up.

“I’m hurrrt,” the guy said, slurring his words. “Why did you cut my call?”

“I think you have the wrong number, mister,” she told him firmly. 

There was silence for a long minute, before the guy whispered quietly. “But I like your voice.”

Felicity blinked in surprise at the sincerity in the tone, before shaking it off. “Um. Thanks, I guess. But I have to...”

“Your voice is like red wine,” the guy interrupted. “It’s making me heady.”

“I like red wine,” she said before she could stop it.

“Me too. I have my own nightclub. _Verdant_ ,” he informed her, pride evident in his tone. Felicity sat mute, stunned. Verdant? No way. There was no way...

 _Oliver fucking Queen_ had drunk dialed her by mistake. She took a deep breath and opened her mouth to talk, but he interrupted, again, his voice a whisper. 

“My best friend just passed out,” he babbled without pause. “We are at our party. It’s great. We sang. A lot. And danced too. And I think I’m a little drunk. Do you think I’m drunk? I’m a little sleepy too. I should sleep before I find some girl. Tommy and I have vowed to stay away from girls for a week. It’s _compcilated...no...compli-naked..._  no, that’s not right. Do you under _...stand?”_

Felicity covered her mouth with her hand to stop the giggles from bursting out. His jumbled words and that concentrated tone as he tried to get them out were surprisingly cute. Drunk Oliver Queen sure was entertaining.  

“Yes,” she replied, laughing. 

She heard a soft sigh on the line. “I like your laugh. I like your voice too. Have I told you that? Talk to me.”

Felicity raised her eyebrows.

“Please.”

Well, he’d said please. And she was enjoying this, whatever this was. Decision made, she settled back in her pillows, and started talking. It was a strange, long night.

* * *

 

**STAGE #2 : ACQUAINTANCES**

The second time Oliver Queen called her was much like the first - in the middle of the night, completely drunk. Except she was at a party of her own, with her work colleagues in a bar, getting bored out of her mind. 

“I'm Oliver,” he told her the moment she picked the call, loud music blasting from behind him. It was blasting behind her too. 

“I know!” she shouted into the phone. There was a pause for a moment, before he yelled. 

“You were supposed to tell me your name!”

Felicity laughed. “Was I?”

“Yes! I have your number saved in my phone as ‘Call When Drunk’. It’s not very becoming!”

Felicity could tell from his voice and words he wasn’t as drunk as he’d been the last time, but he was _well_ on his way. 

“You can change it to Felicity,” she told him, walking towards the exit of the bar, waving at her colleagues. 

“Facility?” he yelled. “What kind of a name is _Facility?”_

Felicity burst out laughing at the strange horror in his tone, her voice loud in the empty street as she waited for her cab. 

“Is that your dial-a-goddess, Ollie?” someone yelled in the background. “Can I talk to her?”

“Go away, Tommy,” Oliver spoke away from the phone. 

Before she could speak though, he shouted to her. “Facilitate me, _Facility._ ”

“Her name is Facility?” the guy who was Tommy (Tommy Merlyn she assumed) asked before guffawing. 

“Hey, I get to call her that, idiot,” Oliver spoke to him, and Felicity listened, highly amused. “Go find your own Facility.”

And both the men burst into loud guffaws at that. Felicity shook her head, a smile on her lips. Her cab came and she climbed in, spending her entire ride correcting her name and laughing when he deliberately  _refused_ to correct it.

* * *

 

**STAGE 3 : FRIENDS**

“What is a place like me doing in a man like this?”

Felicity rolled her eyes at his opening line, pausing the movie on screen. Oliver calling her when he got drunk should have been annoying. It wasn’t. Not after almost a year of phone calls. She found it funny, especially since she’d actually met him after that second call. He’d been sober and slightly embarrassed. And refused to change her name from Facility on his phone. 

Now, after months of hanging out with him and Tommy, she knew they were both serious, focused men who actually took their club very, very seriously. So, she didn’t mind when they let loose once in a while and when he called her. She’d rather he call her than anyone else. 

“And here I thought you were original, mister,” she smiled into the phone, almost able to see the way he furrowed his brows at that. 

“I thought it was,” he muttered, deflated.

“Nope. It’s from _The Mummy._  Except it’s not a ‘man like this’ but a ‘girl like this’ since the speaker is a woman.”

“That makes sense,” he spoke, and she imagined him nodding. “We just finished the movie.”

Felicity’s eyebrows hit her hairline. “You watched _The Mummy_ with Tommy and a bunch of guys on your boys night? Seriously?”

“It’s a great movie,” he said, his tone defensive. “It’s our pack secret. We watch romance sometimes too. And then we sing the bad musical numbers all over the penthouse.”

“Dude, why don’t you tell her about how whipped you are while you’re at it?” Tommy’s yelled in the background, his tone grumpy. “Tell her the national secrets too.” 

Oliver cursed loudly, away from the phone, before coming back. 

“Felicity?” he asked quietly, the sincerity at odds with his drunk stage. 

“Yes, Oliver?” she asked in an equally quiet voice, her pulse throbbing. 

“I’m whipped.”

She couldn’t hear the boisterous laughter of the guys on the phone over her own heartbeat.

* * *

 

**STAGE 4 : LOVERS**

Felicity poured the wine in Thea’s kitchen as the younger woman and Lyla both got the movie ready. It was a girl’s night in since Oliver was out of town with Tommy on club business. And since he had a habit of calling her late before he slept, she didn’t really think she had anything to worry about when her phone rang in the living room. 

“It’s Ollie,” Thea called out to her.

“Just tell him I’ll be there in a minute, Thea,” Felicity shouted from the kitchen, putting the cork back in the bottle. 

Silence.

“God, someone _bleach_ my ears out!” Thea groaned loudly, before handing Felicity the phone with a disgusted expression on her face.

Curious, Felicity put the phone to her ear, and heard loud guitar in the background. 

“Oliver?”

“Felicity!” he sang loudly, completely off whatever key he was supposed to be on. _“Why don’t we do it on the sand?!”_

Felicity gaped at the bottle in her hand for a second, before shaking her head. “We’ve never been to a beach?” she mumbled uncertainly. 

_“Why don’t we do it on the roof?”_

He was drunk. And out. With Tommy. And singing to her. Publicly. 

Oh lord. 

Face flushed, Felicity grinned. “Because our roofs are slanted, hotshot.”

“Why don’t we do it in the shower?”

“We do, Oliver. Multiple times.”

There was a pause. “Yeah, we do. When I’m back we’ll do it on the floor. Then, the table. Then, the bed. Felicity, _why don’t we do it on the airplane?”_

Her cheeks ached from her grins. “We will the next time.”

_“Why don’t we do it in a club?”_

The ideas she got that night were educational.

* * *

 

**STAGE 5 : SPOUSES**

“Felicity?” he whispered on the line, his voice slurred.

“Hey, baby,” she whispered back, sleepy, stifling a yawn. He’d gone for Tommy’s bachelor party, and with the way the guys were, absolutely adorable and hell-raisers together, she’d doubted he would need to call her. 

“How’s the little guy?” he asked quietly and Felicity smiled, patting her swollen stomach. 

“Sleeping,” she murmured. He took a few deep breaths, before speaking. 

“A girl hit on me,” he said, and Felicity blinked her sleep away, her trust in him, despite his old reputation, never wavering. 

“I told her I wasn’t available,” he informed her in a whisper, which told her he was in a quiet room. “She tried to come on to me really badly.”

Felicity felt her anger stir, the urge to punch the bitch on her face profound.

“What happened?” she asked him. 

He sighed. “Tommy pulled me away. I told her to back off or she’d have to find a new identity. I’m married to a genius, you see.”

Felicity smiled, rubbing her stomach. “Are you now?”

“Yeah. I met her five years ago. Called her by mistake, actually. The best mistake of my life.”

Her heart melted. “She picked up by mistake too.”

They stayed silent for a few moments before she spoke again. “You aren’t supposed to call me on a bachelor party night, you know.”

“Yup,” he spoke, popping the P’s. “That’s why I’m hiding in the men’s room. I think Tommy knows I’m here. Talking to you.”

She rolled her eyes. “Of course he does. If it weren’t for him, you’d have called me at your bachelor party too.”

“He’d taken my phone,” Oliver grumbled. 

Someone knocked in the background. “Ollie, I swear if you don’t come out in five seconds, I’m destroying your phone! And say hi to Felicity for me.”

Tommy.

Felicity laughed at Oliver’s expletives. “Go. Have fun. I love you.”

“I love you too,” he said softly, blowing her a loud kiss that Tommy made gag noises at, before cutting the call. 

Felicity closed her eyes and put her phone aside, still on ringing mode, knowing he would call again soon.

**Author's Note:**

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> 
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> 
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